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I occasionally have the pleasure of arranging the animal models for photo shoots. Nothing too glamorous, just a hamster for an ad paper here or a betta for a package label there. Small stuff really, and truly not part of my job, but I rarely turn down an opportunity to help out.
I haven’t had any formal training in the model selection process. To learn, I watched a fair amount of America’s Next Top Model. Unfortunately Tyra Banks is no help when it comes to choosing a good looking Leopard Gecko. What Tyra did teach me is that models have a “shelf life”. They can’t be models forever.
Which brings me to Noodles.
Noodles, the Diva
Noodles is a guinea pig. I’m sure you’ve seen her. She is a short-haired, tortoiseshell and white colored guinea pig who has graced the pages of many ad papers representing guinea pigs everywhere. Her pet parent, Jody, works on the team that buys all the guinea pig supplies. Noodles gets the best treats and the best toys and the best food. She has everything a cute piggy could ask for. But Noodles is a bit of a diva.
So came the dreaded day when I had to let Jody know that I would no longer need Noodles’s services. “But why?” Jody asked looking at me with puppy dog eyes. She looked like she was going to cry. I was sweating. Jody is super sweet and I hated to break her heart.
“Just like a Band-Aid, Rob.” I thought to myself. “Do it really quick and just rip it off! Go! GO! GO!”
I looked back at Jody and she still had the puppy dog eyes!! I panicked and blurted out the truth — “SHE’S TOO OLD AND TOO FAT AND SHE BITES!!!”
Whew! I’m glad that was over! I wonder if Tyra has ever had to say that. Probably.
Sidney, the Punk
I suddenly had a new problem. Jody’s puppy dog eyes became vicious junkyard dog eyes. “WHAT??!! She is not fat!! She’s..she’s voluptuous! Who are you replacing her with? Sidney? Sidney’s a punk!!”
Yes, I was replacing Noodles with Sidney and, yes, she is a punk. She’s young, sassy, and has crazy hair that makes her look as if she just stepped off a speedboat. She’s supermodel material!
Noodles will ALWAYS be a model in Auntie Stephanie’s world
What does Sidney have that Noodles doesn’t – besides unruly bedhead?
That is a great blog! I love it!!!
Ok, ok… Sidney IS really cute; please don’t tell Noodles her mom said that though!!
Geez…do u have no shame?? Noodles has paid his dues. Fat hamsters are hamsters too! This society is so quick to look for greener pastures. I’d like to see what u look like after years in a 30″x15″ space and nothing to do except eat! Lol. Then we can give your job to some ‘skinny’ hamster.
Hilarious post. Love this!
I think they are both beautiful. My daughter would love them both also but would probably choose Sidney as her favorite. She has a hamster that has the wildest hair, some of George’s hair is an inch longer than the rest and has no rhyme or reason to the design.
Noodles doesn’t always bite… She hasn’t bit me in the 3 years that I’ve known her… but then again, I know when she’s about to!
they r both sooo cute
PUNK LOOKS fat so why is she doing
the adds i know if you did this to my
guinea pig i would sue thy all nible
and get bing
GASP! How sad to hear that the guinea pigs of the world are now being exposed to the same disgusting media driven social pressures that young human females are! Noodles is a woman…and women are SUPPOSED to be voluptuous! Perhaps she only bit you because you were judging her. HMMPH. Serves you right.
Auntie Jenni in Massachusetts
This is hysterical!! HAHA!! I too, know Noodles the Guinea Pig. I can hear her scurry around her cage during the day, and squeak happily when Jody gets to work each morning. I have to admit…she does bite!! Sorry Noodles, I love you, but it will have to remain love from afar…
Pretty darn funny!
It’s called “tough love”!
Hey Noodles, don’t you worry! Buttercream has waddled into the fray to support your curves! And how else are you supposed to grind down your teeth if not on the bones of your judgmental handlers? GO, NOODLES, GO!
Gina and Buttercream (the size XXL piggy)HEART Noodles =D
Judging by the comments, I think “Team Noodles” is in the lead.
Oh the short “career lifespan” of a model.
The only thing Sidney has going for her is her youth… and I guess her hip hair-do?
Noodles is still awesome in my book!
I commented on our internal story so I have to follow up here: Team Noodles!!! Jack loves his Auntie Jody and her guinea pig, so Noodles is loved by two-legged AND the four-legged creatures.
Noodles is still the best looking by a mile she has tha beautiful round sleek face that makes a camera melt!! Punk has that just rolled out of bed look and seems to me it would be hard for the camera lens to get all of him lololol. I say Go TEAM NOODLES!!!!
Noodlesss, baby, your timesss up! SSSoundssss like ssshe needsss a good home. If ssshesss really asss popular asss you sssay, then it ssshouldn’t be hard.
from your ssscaley friend, JaJa
psssss…Punk, baby, love the do!
work it sssidney
How could anybody say this about a guinea pig?!!! Guinea Pigs are one of the best creatures around
Please Petco…Stop with animal cruelty in your stores, cages, basements, hands….Please!
Your site has marvellous pics….Animals in your hidden cages Not!!!
End with animals cruelty!!!